kat (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
rest_now_my_brave_warrior) wrote2022-05-27 11:21 pm
rest_now_my_brave_warrior) wrote2022-05-27 11:21 pm
Entry tags:
[slinks in on little cat feet]
hi everyone.
everything u need to know about me can be gleaned from the fact i’m a pisces sun with a leo moon. i also have 10th and 11th house stelliums and an obsession with Fe. i hope these are just words to u.
for the proper biohazard warning: my name is kat (pronounced (^ • ⋏ • ^)ﾉ☆). this place is so allergic to, like, making sense but my mirror self told me i’d find the only path left to normalcy/salvation here, and while i think my derangement makes me look like a princess i also really like the sound of my own voice LOL
sharing is my Way of Life so feel free to comment anywhere if u wanna be added!
everything u need to know about me can be gleaned from the fact i’m a pisces sun with a leo moon. i also have 10th and 11th house stelliums and an obsession with Fe. i hope these are just words to u.
for the proper biohazard warning: my name is kat (pronounced (^ • ⋏ • ^)ﾉ☆). this place is so allergic to, like, making sense but my mirror self told me i’d find the only path left to normalcy/salvation here, and while i think my derangement makes me look like a princess i also really like the sound of my own voice LOL
sharing is my Way of Life so feel free to comment anywhere if u wanna be added!
no subject
omg ur mirror self sounds so cool and sexy and perfectly normal.... dreamwidth begs u not to use it bc it will kill u <3 but not bc it's the best platform. 100% of dreamwidth users have eventually died. ur extremely cute and charming and obviously ur age [redacted]
the gun is lowered!!
no subject
my mirror self, defying everything that’s fundamental to who i am, is a little loser. i’ve heard she’s working on it. i’ve also heard she’s practicing the forbidden idolsona cultivation art. i miss the days when sources only ever had one opinion.
i’m not like the 100%. i’m different. i’m crazier. i’m extremely cute-r and charming-er and (i am asked by a vaguely divine being to stop speaking before my reincarnation card gets revoked) (i.e. thank u :])
the gun is replaced with a knife. it’s not a fancy knife with initials engraved onto blade or a gold-embossed sheath. it’s a barely recognisable kitchen knife i fought a dumpster-diving raccoon for. this is how you will die. alternatively this is how you will become a killer.
p.s. i like how dw just lets me talk forever. twitter’s always like can this bitch shut up and dw is like that’s so mean twitter :( she can talk! (and then she did! we both did!)
no subject
that feels like a lie.... ur mirror self sounds so cool and tall and not a little loser at all. she sounds like the ultimate winner of life and that the universe gives her everything she wants when she doesn't ignore it <33333 i heard she's doing GREAT at growing into herself <3 FORBIDDEN IDOLSONA CULTIVATION ART ..... this is so funny ur so funny.... yes i heard that that was the coolest cultivation art to come out in the new century !!! she sounds SO cool like i want to talk to her <3 u miss the days of tyranny <3 mo ran relates <3
screaming why r we SO funny. (ur reincarnation card can't get revoked <3333 i asked the admin!!! even scattering it doesn't work!!!! we're meant 4 something APPARENTLY.)
oh my god did i tell ur abt the kitchen scissors used for the bangs? the handle was falling off one of the blades and they taped it on but that only made it worse!!!! that feels like this knife <3 i will simply die <3 pacifism netted a life debt so ur really getting the long end of the stick this interaction around !!!!!
p.s. i knowwwwwwww i love it sm. twt is like. 280 ch or shut. and i shut!!!! actually [spies twts abt jc] sometimes it's good 4 being deranged abt jc!!!!! i love jc so much have i ever mentioned that? i just think he's the best. i think he is the best and he's the no. 1 hottest in MY heart. [we're talking forever. kind of want a wordcount for how much we've talked on dc bc we talk SO MUCH. so much.]
no subject
do u want to know something terrible. my username is from genshin. it’s the voiceline of this twink/alcoholic/bard/god (his identities are listed in order of importance). i’m sorry for being who i am but also i do like it. i think i Will rest now. <— is instead replying to dw comments and pouring my heart & soul into understanding a fictional scorpio man
my mirror self is, at best, Okay. no i’m kidding i love her. of course i love her and all her… um…… growing and idolsona cultivationing. MO RAN RELATES 😭 that does not at all feel like a respectable sentence but i’ve said it so i’ll stick with it. like that kpop fan who defended karl marx bc they thought op was talking abt nct mark
we r SOOO funny we r actually so funny. maybe it’s self-obsession but humour has never been more reverently worshipped. i enjoy how we talk in different frequencies over 3 different platforms, all of them also varying levels of mentally ill. so true of us. the universe will never be able to make this (gestures between us) ever again! (i cant believe u’d do that for me :pleading_face: and i also can’t believe corporate actually cares………? can we choose what we r meant 4)
U DID NOT TELL ME ABT THE KITCHEN SCISSORS but i’ve been thinking of them sporadically for the past week ish. WHY WOULD THEY DO THAT …… maybe that’s one of the requirements for cutting nice bangs actually. there’s something abt cutting ur own bangs that demands a very intense kind of derangement. we’ll go one step further by using this knife and a blindfold. me, the long end of the stick… incredible!!!!! i will hold it in my mouth. i dont know why i keep giving u f*rry ammunition. there are no kernels of truth here please look away thank u.
p.p.s. reading ur daily i love jc spiel after reading ur mdzs is so funny. u r so obsessed with this man and i support u so much. i love it when i’m not the craziest one in the room (dw comment thread) sometimes….<3 [WE R TALKING FOREVER… god i wish we cld hv a wordcount bc i swear we just cannot shut up. like even w my adjustment period we r noisy. i wish there was also a way to include calls in the wordcount too LOL]
no subject
oh my god u have such severe brainrot. virgin impact shaped ur dw username. foul. u chose a twink/alcoholic/bardgod. THE FICTIONAL SCORPIO MAN IS SO IMPORTANT 2 ME..
no i’m kidding i love her. of course i love her and all her… um…… growing and idolsona cultivationing
the um.... of it all!!!! foul!!! her idolsona cultivationing is like, that foul cultivation method wwx invented but 1000% cooler and better in every way possible [sniped by inquiry]
it's not a respectable sentence!!!! im so glad u got that. OH MY GOD... i love kpop and how sincere fans r in their insanity.. the way op really pulled up and said quick history lesson FOR NCT MARK ...... im so glad it wasn't nct johnny at least.
we're so funny ..... it is the self-obsession but let the wheel roll on!!! also i asked for me ... the universe literally couldn't make [replicates gesture] ever again.. [corporate does not care, it has set goals !!! aws we can't choose. we go on this road or we go off into the wilderness, collapse and wake up on the track again.
THE KITCHEN SCISSORS ... i love being a recurring thought.. idk they were antsy 4 the change of it all. u truly do have the long end of the stick .. oh my god u r german furry..... i will never look away <3 as you never look away when we end up at the same place from two different directions.
p.p.p.s I JUST LIKE JC SO MUCH ........ truly my cross 2 bear.. i am so obsessed with him. i've never been as obsessed with anyone as much as i am him. crazy4crazy menace4menace we keep on tallying it up, the shape of what we are to one another. and yet it is still not enough. but we know!! i really wish there was a way to have a wordcount of everything.. it would be nice. we kind of do w discord but it still isn't enough .... ! EVEN WITH UR ADJUSTMENT PERIOD .. im keen 4 when im neck deep in scholasticisms :] IT'S A REAL WORD .. no red line 4 me sonny boy!!!! but also what abt the thoughts i have when i think of u...... they're not included..... aws i think of u fondly. i think u r such a good little menace.
ᓚᘏᗢ ♡ ᗢᘏᓗ (kitties w kissies)
i wld also like a mirror self… to be very distinguished from my reflection as well, as my reflected version chooses only to reflect what may cut deepest in the fragments of my mind at any given point - perhaps my mirror self could provide me with some much-needed peace and also, ideally, the ability to read social cues and make friends with my (frankly, homophobic) coworkers right now. i do envy your ability to connect with people so overwhelmingly fast - i feel like im always just off by an inch, either just a little too loud or too quiet, or too hard-working or too lazy. of course, the aforementioned homophobia unfortunately may play a role in my current unpleasant situation, as i have a feeling that my desire to be considered cheerful and kind to all the girls in my workplace has backfired into a large number of them misguidedly assuming that, as a lesbian (and as straight girls do), i have some kind of interest in them. sighs dramatically… at some point I’ll find a job where i both enjoy my work and connect with my coworkers.
so much for a shorter message… i think your lan wangji pfp is cringe and terrible but considering i have a xiao profile picture, i feel as though any criticism would be largely like shooting myself in the foot. that feeling would be wrong, though, since comparing xiao and lwj for me is as comparing the sun and moon(glazed) - one can only glow by reflecting the ever-bright light of the other’s radiance. love u!
Re: ᓚᘏᗢ ♡ ᗢᘏᓗ (kitties w kissies)
i alr touched on this a little bit bc i get ahead of myself often but yes!!! that’s one of the major appeals of intps to me (or maybe even well-adjusted isfjs… #samecognitivestackthings), that proximity to yourself without ever crossing the border of your internal world. i read this fic yesterday that likened the human self to a house — there’s the “maintenance involved to keep yourself running. kitchens to cook up your ambition, a sitting room for your pride, basements full of ghosts. rooms that were locked. rooms you let other people see. rooms you don’t like to think about” (i recommend this fic w my whole heart btw i think yeonjun’s process of self-acceptance/self-love was kind of similar to my own and i consider us very similar in that regard!!! in other words, i didn’t cry but i felt like crying and that’s all that matters). meeting someone similar to you but Outside of yourself is like… i don’t know, visiting another unit in your apartment. it’s got the same structure with slightly different decor. underneath the carpets and potted plants and paintings you recognise exactly what this place is. there’s a comfort in loving something without ever letting it truly exist within you, in proving you’re capable of it — love, in general. some kind of inward stability. i’m getting ahead of myself…
it means a lot to me that u think i connect to people well TT__TT it’s not news w the whole (gestures) leo moon thing that i want to be liked but i want to be liked in a way i can feel! i don’t have to understand it but i want to feel it. and to feel it i need to connect to the person conveying something to me. honestly growing up as an athlete probably did some Damage I Can’t Yet See bc i loved that feeling so much, of knowing i was liked in some way, that i latched onto the mechanism of it — how to find it, how to cultivate it, how to keep it. in almost a cruel way i feel sometimes. the point being that i don’t look into myself often and other people are usually embarrassed telling u they like u so i don’t get to hear if i’m actually likeable (or connect-able maybe is more accurate) or not.
and on that note… u were never even a single inch off 4 me. i think sometimes u land too well and it startles people. maybe it’s not that they don’t like that you can see them, but that they can see you. i hope u get a job with better coworkers TT___TT i’m punching all of them in the THROATS rn!!!! when will we be free of straight girls w overinflated egos 😭
god this got super long ok i’m wrapping it up now…
sorry for being a lwj liker i guess. actually no i have nothing to apologise for this man is the istj of my dreams. someone i would marry if i were a man… you know the drill. i did consider hving a xiao pfp!!!! bc he’s my baby bird. but i’m so attached to this lwj fa for some reason i can’t let it go… lwj is an istj i would marry and xiao is an istj i would tend to in the terrified reverent way people tend to a sick child. u don’t know if they’re going to make it, but if anyone could make it it’d be them. and they make u pray.
(ALSO? the kitties w kissies? and i thought the perfect kaomoji was my name??!?!)